NEW ELEMENT
- Details About Morass & Neutrons(DAMN), Governmentium Overall Outlook and Development (GOOD), On Next Electionism (ONE)
A
major research institution (MRI) has recently announced the discovery
of the heaviest chemical element yet known to science. The new element
has been tentatively named Governmentium. Governmentium has 1 neutron,
12 assistant neutrons, 75 deputy neutrons, and 224 assistant deputy
neutrons, giving it an atomic mass of 312. These 312 particles are held
together by forces called morons, which are surrounded by vast
quantities of lepton-like particles called peons. Since governmentium
has no electrons, it is inert. However, it can be detected as it impedes
every reaction with which it comes into contact. A minute amount of
governmentium causes one reaction to take over four days to complete
when it would normally take less than a second. Governmentium has a
normal half-life of three years; it does not decay, but instead
undergoes a reorganization in which a portion of the assistant neutrons
and deputy neutrons exchange places. In fact, governmentium’s mass will
actually increase over time, since each reorganization will cause some
morons to become neutrons, forming isodopes.
This
characteristic of moron-promotion leads some scientists to speculate
that governmentium is formed whenever morons reach a certain quantity in
concentration. This hypothetical quantity is referred to as Critical
Morass.
- The new element has been tentatively named "governmentium," symbol "GV" on the updated Periodic Chart."
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